Have you ever been confused about the boundary between loving yourself and also loving others?
This is what Rosanna is struggling with. She asked:
“How do I know where the boundary is between self-love and selfless love that I need to give my child? How much should I give? I know this is only a temporary situation when my child is young. Also the same question for a relationship, Where’s the boundary between self-love and what you need to give to keep the relationship nurtured? THANK YOU !!! “
If she were working with Rosanna, she would ask her:
“Rosanna, would you feel good about yourself if you neglected your son?” I’m sure her answer would be no. Therefore, it is loving yourself to love her child.
I know that sometimes it is difficult to understand that when we love ourselves we also love others. An important aspect of loving ourselves is giving to others because it gives us joy to give. In fact, the more you love yourself and fill yourself with love, the more you want to share your love with others.
Rosanna asks: “… where is the boundary between self-love and what you need to give to keep the relationship nurtured?”
There is no limit between self-love and love for a partner. If loving a partner feels like an obligation, like what you need to do rather than what you want to do, then what you are really giving is not love. When you love someone, then you want to give to that person and you want to keep the relationship nurtured because that is what loves you too.
If you feel that you are obligated to keep the relationship nurtured, then you are probably trying to control your partner by caring for them. No form of control loves you or your partner, and caring is certainly a form of control.
Sometimes the hurt self can convince you that you are lovingly caring for yourself when what is really happening is that you are ignoring what really makes you happy and is in integrity with your soul. For example, if your baby cries at night and you are exhausted, your hurt self might say that taking care of yourself is letting your baby cry. But on a deeper level, if you really tune in to what makes you feel good about yourself and is in integrity with your soul, you will know that allowing a helpless baby to cry, no matter onlyfans free trial how tired you are, is not in integrity with your soul. . the essence of your soul. While the hurt self says, “I need to sleep,” the loving adult says, “I need to love my baby more than I need to sleep. I chose to have this child knowing that I would be sleep deprived and need to stay.” in faith with myself regarding my internal agreement to be loving with my baby. “